EP:3 The Mind of an Abuser, How does it work? Decoding Domestic Violence

Decoding The Domestic Violence


In this podcast, join Iti Rawat, founder of the Red Dot Initiative, as we unravel the silent epidemic of domestic violence. With a focus on ‘Decoding the Domestic Violence,’ we explore its various forms, shed light on the psychology of an abuser, and discuss ways to prevent and heal, drawing from the experiences of supporting and rescuing over 500 victims since the pandemic began.

Understanding Domestic Abuse

Domestic abuse isn’t limited to just physical violence; it encompasses emotional, financial, and sexual abuse as well. It’s prevalent across different socioeconomic strata, including educated individuals. Recent high-profile cases have exposed the ugly truth that domestic violence knows no bounds and threatens our culture and traditions.

What Drives an Abuser to Inflict Harm?

Abusers view their victims as extensions of themselves, not as separate individuals. When their expectations aren’t met, they resort to punishment. Their fragile egos can’t handle criticism, even constructive, and they quickly feel insulted. Abusers often perceive themselves as perfectionists and can’t tolerate imperfections. Any failure, real or perceived, becomes the victim’s fault. They resort to tactics like silent treatment, gaslighting, and taking control.

Are Abusers Fearless?

Contrary to popular belief, abusers are not fearless; they fear tarnishing their public image. They manipulate victims into isolation, discouraging them from confiding in friends or family. They enforce submission and privacy, masking their abusive behavior.

Recognizing Abusers’ Emotional Patterns

Abusers are typically anxious individuals whose emotions manifest as physical and verbal abuse. They employ control tactics like name-calling and shaming, both privately and publicly.

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Breaking Free from the Cycle

Recognizing the signs of an abuser is crucial. If you resonate with any of the described patterns, seek help. Abusive behavior is not normal, and every individual, regardless of age or gender, deserves to live with respect. No amount of manipulation can solve the problem, but therapy can help.

Seeking Help and Healing

Mental health issues are like catching a cold. If not treated, they escalate into fever and pneumonia. Acknowledge that your behavior is not normal, and it’s causing toxicity in your relationship. Seek therapy and remember that nothing is more healing than love.

Reach Out and Support

Domestic violence is a scourge that affects individuals across society. By understanding the psychology of abusers, we can identify warning signs, seek help, and work towards breaking the cycle of abuse. Remember, seeking assistance is a sign of strength, and healing is possible. If you need more information or support, reach out to us at weft-foundation.com or asmee.co.in. 

This is Iti Rawat, signing off for today. Please share your feedback in the comments if you found this podcast helpful. 

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Thank you and remember, every voice matters in the fight against domestic violence.

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Listen to the whole interview below